Why facts and arguments are not enough
When a conflict escalates, people often try to argue their case even more convincingly. Figures are presented, positions are explained and responsibilities are clarified. But behind many disputes, completely different questions have already emerged: Am I being heard? Is my contribution appreciated? Am I being treated with respect?
This is precisely why two intelligent people can assess the same situation completely differently. Anyone who searches for a solution exclusively on the factual level often overlooks the actual conflict.
In one mediation I facilitated, for example, two employees of a banking team were facing each other: one worked particularly accurately, the other particularly quickly. Both were convinced that the other person's way of working was the problem. Only when we began discussing the interests and needs behind their positions did the situation change.
At the end, one participant said: “You have no idea how much I enjoy coming to work again.”
Conflict competence is a business success factor
Conflict is by no means simply a question of workplace atmosphere. Unresolved tensions can contribute to absenteeism, employee turnover, blocked decisions and a loss of innovation.
For me, conflict competence is therefore one of the key qualities of effective leadership.
Good leadership does not mean avoiding conflict. It means recognising tensions early, making different interests visible and enabling constructive confrontation: creating clarity without unnecessarily damaging relationships.
Resistance can be valuable
This becomes particularly evident during periods of change. Companies develop strategies, define processes and communicate new objectives – and are then surprised when employees resist them.
But resistance is not automatically a problem that needs to be eliminated. It can be a signal that important interests, fears or experiences have not yet been taken into account.
Especially during transformation, success therefore depends not only on the quality of the strategy, but also on who is involved, when they are involved and how they are involved.
The crucial change of perspective
Whether in leadership, negotiation or transformation, we should not view conflict solely as a disruption. Conflict shows us where relationships, expectations or interests need to be clarified.
The decisive question is therefore not:
How do I win this conflict?
But rather:
How can we find a solution that allows us to continue working successfully together tomorrow?
Those who make this shift in perspective gain more than an argument. They create the foundation for trust, collaboration and sustainably better results.