Appearing convincingly - without stress and anxiety: This is how it works!

Almost everyone knows the situation: sweaty hands, a queasy feeling in the stomach, and a shaky voice paired with trembling knees - those who have to give a speech or a presentation in front of others sometimes really start to sweat. Even initially well-disposed listeners or conversational partners tend to form a damning judgment when topics are presented with an inconsistent, insecure, or disinterested demeanor. Only those who appear self-confident can expect a positive judgment from their surroundings - unless you are aiming for pity. Approximately 85 percent of all people feel tense or nervous when they have to speak in front of others. Even supposed professional speakers know this feeling. It is a natural reaction of the body that occurs when we expose ourselves to unfamiliar situations or make ourselves seemingly vulnerable. As always in life, the key is moderation. A little stage fright can be good for a convincing performance, but too much of it hinders our thinking and paralyzes our composure. This nervousness can be transformed into positive energy. Two points are necessary for this: you prepare well for the content, the "WHAT." And you prepare for "HOW" - with what style - you want to communicate your content. Because, as scientific studies show, the "HOW" is mostly more decisive than the "WHAT" in determining whether you connect with your listeners and conversational partners. Of course, it is assumed that your "WHAT" is technically correct. The Fatal: Those who appear uncertain are perceived as incompetent, and often even as untrustworthy, even if they have a high level of expertise. The Good: Confident and convincing demeanor can be learned. The first impression you leave is crucial - on the way to the speaker's podium, to your presentation, or when greeting others. You leave the first impression in a fraction of a second - your expertise does not help you with that. For the first impression, you only have two "signals": your clothing and your body language. Always adapt your clothing to the occasion, your role and personality, as well as the expectations of those you are interacting with. Would you be convinced of a painter's competence if he were to conduct a sample stroke at your home in a suit and tie before being awarded the contract? Ensure that your body language, especially your facial expressions and hands, radiate positive signals from the first impression. Do you want to predispose your counterpart negatively before your actual performance even begins? After the first impression, communication truly begins. This also increases the number of pitfalls you can fall into. Often, you can already recognize with whom you are dealing just by the way you greet them. Even people who are not trained in greeting rules can sense some of their counterpart's character traits, for example, through their handshake. After the greeting or the walk to the podium, your rhetorical skills come into play. You can open or close other people with your choice of words - as well as with your facial expressions and gestures. Why? Because all people subconsciously react similarly to certain words and gestures. Knowing this is a key to success. There are words that almost certainly evoke rejection and distance in your counterpart. And there are words that almost immediately make almost anyone unconsciously switch to justification mode - even if that is not the speaker's intention at all. The communication model of Schulz von Thun says hello. Of course, you can also choose words that evoke openness and interest in your conversation partners - regardless of whether you are conducting a sales conversation, a job interview, or giving a speech. In addition to individual words, various rhetorical techniques are available to you to make a good impression, persuade, and achieve your goals. One of these techniques, for example, is a professional (!) questioning technique. By the way: A professional questioning technique must become second nature - even professional talk show hosts and moderators often ask amateurishly. In addition to pure rhetorical skills, an appropriate mental attitude towards convincing appearance is also crucial: Your words and formulations should make it clear that you consider your conversation partners or listeners important and take them seriously with how you formulate, rather than seeing yourself as the center of the world. Negative examples can be found in abundance in sales as well as in personnel management. Last but not least: It is particularly important that your choice of words and your body language harmonize. Fortunately, we humans have retained "antennas" from the early days of our history to distinguish between consistent and inconsistent behavior. Someone who verbally expresses joy at having many listeners present during a speech, while displaying a grim expression, simply appears untrustworthy. A similar effect is achieved by someone who shakes their head while speaking, which in Germany is interpreted as "no," even though they want to convince with their content. Your body language reveals unmistakably what you really mean and feel - unless you are a top actor. The body never lies - while words can be chosen arbitrarily. Only if you manage to appear consistent do you have a good chance of truly convincing. Now the question may arise: Do I have to be a natural talent to appear confidently and convincingly in front of people? No, you don't have to be. However, what you should do is constantly question your appearance critically and, if necessary, work on it through high-quality training. Learning to appear convincingly is similar to learning a foreign language. It is not enough to just master vocabulary. Only if you know the connecting link between the vocabulary - in the case of a foreign language, the grammar - will you be understood as you want to be. Applied to learning to appear convincingly: It would be insufficient to attend individual seminars in rhetoric, etiquette, and body language - possibly even with different trainers. Because in such seminars, you may learn a lot of "vocabulary." However, you will only learn the "grammar," the connecting link between rhetoric, etiquette, and body language, in specifically designed training sessions and seminars. At Stilwelt®, you can be sure that training this grammar is at the center - tailored to your individual personality and the situations in which you need to be convincing. And this is not just a sales pitch, but a sincere promise. It would be disastrous if a bunch of "trained" people emerged after a training. Beyond the basic knowledge, the individual nuances of appearance are always important: What may be too weak in gestures for an extroverted person may already appear completely convincing for an introverted person. Feel free to reach out to me at any time if you are truly interested in professional and convincing appearance. As alternatives to refining your appearance, company-internal seminars, individual training sessions, or long-term coaching are available to you. Warm regards, Peter A. Worel For Your Information: In the future, Stilwelt® will exclusively offer company-internal training, individual training, coaching, and lectures. Open seminars at Stilwelt® will only be available in conjunction with industry-specific cooperation partners. We believe that the benefit for the participants in classic open seminars on "Convincing Appearance" is too low, as very heterogeneous requirements and different typical industry customs often prevail, so that only general and superficial content can be conveyed, lacking the time for individual and precise training. Through this new offering, the benefit you receive at Stilwelt® increases. Peter A. Worel is a self-employed management trainer, author, and speaker. As a sought-after expert on the topic of "Convincing Appearance," he works with people from all hierarchical levels of banks, industrial conglomerates, small and medium-sized enterprises, as well as public figures, helping them achieve convincing and successful appearances. One of his mottos is: "Every appearance deserves a fine-tuning."