Please always be very friendly!

It's better to be fake friendly than truly unfriendly

With video "Interview with Manfred Ritschard" We don't always feel friendly. Sometimes we don't feel like being nice - do you know that feeling too? Throughout life, we learn to behave socially competent. We put on a friendly face and speak with a friendly voice, especially when it would be inappropriate to show displeasure. We have learned that it is often better to be fake friendly than truly unfriendly. Kindness is the oil that lubricates the gears of communication among people. This is an everyday challenge for many professionals in dealing with customers. The good thing is: the longer we pretend to be friendly, the friendlier we feel - this is called the congruence principle: As inside, so outside, but also as outside, so inside. In my communication and sales training, teaching techniques of professional friendliness is the first step. This is the key to successful relationship building with people. A good relationship creates trust and is the basis for any successful interaction, whether it's flirting on the tram on the way to work, at the checkout in a department store, or during a challenging sales negotiation. In sales, I call this Trust-Selling - more trust, more sales. Or would you buy something from someone you don't like? Kindness is a strategic factor for success Kindness, empathy, and service quality are strategic factors for success. The added value of personal advice and empathetic communication from person to person becomes increasingly important in times of growing digitization. This added value is a matter of kindness and trust. Relationship quality and emotional sales become crucial strengths in companies - more important than bargaining for discounts and percentages. Selective authenticity or we are almost always playing a role Competent customer communication means dealing with customers in a friendly, professional, and efficient manner in every situation. Professionalism is a crucial core competency: In every moment, we decide how much of our thoughts, feelings, and moods we communicate. The influential psychologist Roth Cohn coined the term "selective authenticity" for this. Even more fitting is the quote by Arthur Schnitzler: "We are always playing, and he who knows it is wise." Moments or even times when we are truly ourselves and not playing a role are probably rather rare. For those who like it a bit more complicated, at the end of these reflections, you can ponder over an aphorism by Georg Christoph Lichtenberg: "Wise people believe that pretending to be what one is not is harder than becoming what one wants to appear to be." Read more about how professional and authentic communication is practiced in dealing with customers and within the team. More in my interview video at this link.